The Ending

He didn't entirely understand her reasons, but he didn't blame her for them either. It wasn't that she was being cruel, just that she was the one to snap first and finally bring an end to the tension. The atmosphere between them had been loaded and thick for days... no, weeks. The fact that he was trying to sneak out of the house at 6am without waking her in the first place tells the story in itself. If only she hadn't hidden the key then he wouldn't have needed to rouse her and this conversation wouldn't have happened. Yet. A stay of execution is all it would have been. And what would it have achieved anyway? In what way could her waking to find him gone, having left in secret, possibly have been seen as a positive? No, this was for the best. Still, the nagging suspicion had been with him ever since the text message. Was she leaving him for the ex? He'd asked her, of course, during that brutally tense and awkward discussion, but she'd immediately denied it without going into any detail or getting upset. That only made it worse for him and made him more sure than ever. Still, it made no difference anyway. This wasn't ending because of someone else. Someone else was being sought because this was a sham.

He'd always been intimidated by her. Never felt he was of her league and therefore had refused to open himself up to her, even in the early days when it was clear that she cared about him. After all, hadn't she been the driving force in this relationship? Wanting more than a casual fling was her idea, proof if any were ever needed that she had no such worries about incompatibility. Once again his own inability to handle matters like a fully functioning adult had cost him something. The real tragedy here though wasn't that it was ending, it was that it had been allowed to limp along like this for so long before being put out of its misery. He knew that if he'd acknowledged it to her, rather than just to himself, months back then things could and almost certainly would have improved quickly and the affair would have gone back to its roots, passionate and exciting and overcoming both of them, the antithesis of the tense shell that their relationship had morphed into due to their extended bouts of silence throughout the late weeks of summer.

It was fitting that the relationship had begun as the snows melted and became serious with the first signs of spring in a flurry of newfound excitement and had climbed like the new shoots towards the sunlight of the first days of summer, only to plateau and then fade and wither as the summer wore on and the autumn drew in. So now here he was, walking in the oh so appropriate drizzle the 6 miles home at 7am feeling a curious mixture of melancholy, suspicion and relief.

But that kiss. Now he understood the meaning of the word "bittersweet".
Hyper Smash
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